Jan 16, 2018

They Turned Teen ... I Wasn't Trained for Teen!

My week started out something like this ...

Husband confiscates daughter's phone and, as we do from time to time, skims through her texts. We don't do it often, but we like to make sure she's not dealing drugs or selling scandalous videos and/or photos of herself online or what have you. Yes ... we're those parents. Sorry, not sorry.

Sooooo ...

Instead he finds a conversation between her and her boyfriend that goes something (and I mean I'm totally exaggerating for dramatic flare here) like this.

Now I actually chose not to read the real text messages after my husband gave me the gist of it, but from what I was told, this is how I interpreted it.

I'm lame. I'm lazy.

This following a very large disagreement with my son a week earlier where, without saying it, he made it clear I'm not worth respecting.

Who are these kids?

I swear they're not mine. My kids don't act like this!

But they do.

And you want to know why?

Because they're teenagers!!!!!!

Teenagers declaring their individuality and their independence.

Who allowed this to happen? 

And just when you think it can't get any more frustrating, they do this ...

They just keep turning more teenagerish!!! 

And then ...

They get their permit!!!
And then ...

They get a checking account and use their debit card for the first time!

And then and then and then ...

They get classy shoes for big events.
They learn how to tie a tie for the first time.

They get new friends.

They get significant others!

They go to homecoming!

They get handsome!

They get pretty ... and pretty goofy.
No seriously, they get pretty!
They pick out their own Christmas trees, Charlie Brown style.

They take care of robot babies for the weekend.

They fail to act classy on a regular basis.

They shoot rockets for sport.

They photobomb what could be good selfies.

They make taking selfies with them impossible

They make lifelong friends despite long distances.
They can be insanely impossible yet amazing all at the same time. I love watching these milestones, but what about in between?

What about those days where they think I'm a monster covered in Jell-o? Which are a plenty during these wonderful teen years!

I KNOW my kids don't hate me ALL the time. Apologies WERE made and the world was set right again. But still, I know they'll dislike me again soon enough. I'm the mom. And for some reason or another, dads are inherently cool and loved and can do no wrong when it comes to teenagers, while moms on the other hand are evil and heartless and can never be as cool as dad. It's a thing. My own mother confirmed it. 

Well there is truly only one thing I can do when I'm thought of as the evil stepmom from Cinderella. I have to remind myself ...

They're never too old to play with balloons.

And ...

You're never too old to hold Dad's hand while iceskating

Playing board games is still cool.

Tiny video game systems are fun to play with mom!

Semi Matching Hoodies are still ok.

Movies with mom is a thing. A fun thing.

You're never too old to fall asleep watching movies in moms bed.

Sometimes selfies with mom are ok.

Planes are still really cool.

And ...

It's still okay to cuddle in the car (as long as you're sleeping and unaware)
Sometimes raising teenagers is a huge chore. Sometimes they hate me. Sometimes they love me. Sometimes I want to pull my hair out. Sometimes I just can't seem to spend enough time with them.

Always raising teens is hard.

I come to this challenge with little to no preparation, and most days I have no clue what I'm doing. I wish my daughter didn't feel like she needed to send texts about me not wanting to drive her places, but let's be honest, I can't be a chauffeur ALL the time! And yeah, if we're being honest, sometimes I just don't want to! And that doesn't make me a bad mom, it just makes me human.

I am a human mom. I hate making dinner. I enforce chores and homework with authority. I despise driving all over the place. I'm typically the one that chooses and doles out the punishments. I like to watch netflix in my room after dinner until bedtime. I have an illness that sometimes leaves me unable to perform every day duties. And I constantly pester my children to see if they want to hang out.

I give my kids plenty of reasons to find me annoying or to dislike me.

But that's ok.

I don't deny it.

I own it.


Because I love those infuriating children with abundance. And chances are, if they don't like me one day or another, it's probably because I'm doing something right.

So bring it on my little teens. Cuz this mama is going to keep on doing her best and trying her hardest despite no handbook, and she's going to keep on loving you far past the days where we have all left this earth! 

And that my friends, is how you raise a teenager. (I hope)

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